It's all work related there's nothing perverse in this. Besides. Why would anyone believe you?
They still has dominion over you - you still want to be left alone with Aziraphale don't you? the two of you...doing...weird and uncomfortable things with your corporations. We may be enemies but we have to work together.
They're not actually that weird and uncomfortable. Unless...have you been trying weird and uncomfortable things with your corporation? Are you trying to model on the two of us that much?
No. For Her sake No. We just get together for...what'd they call it. "Bitch sessions." and out of everybody it turns out we have the same problems and so we talk and they're funny. Like who knew your kind could tell a joke that wasn't wholly blasphemous right? But they're funny. And again. Sanctioned. So.
I mean I'm lucky. We Archangels have each other.
[It's a hive mind some days. but others not so much]
They're all by themselves. I knew it was cutthroat down there but if half the things they've shared are true... they deserve somebody to talk to. They can be obnoxious and they're wrong about like 99% of the great plan? but you know. I'm confident I can make them come around. Understand things. Bathe. Love themselves.
[You know sit down, watch Sound of Music, maybe make them realize their entire existence and decision to disobey her Will was a huge mistake. Get them to clean up their humor a bit. Bathe occasionally.]
I just want you to know that if you had accidentally texted Aziraphale, he'd probably have thought the whole block you just sent me there was very sweet.
So that being said I think you're both probably meant for each other so I'm sending you a whole terabyte of pornography to help get your corporations into weird positions, stand by it'll be coming through might make your phone go a bit slow hang on.
[Crowley is doing no such thing but he can't wait to see what the reaction to that is.]
Go ahead. and I'll just fast track the form I need to smite you. I'd send Michael normally they're desperate for a little action. You prefer the sword or the spear? We have a new flaming spear R&D is testing. Holy fire! Pretty neat.
You do come up a lot it's true. And they don't really respond to my "Just give it time and they'll come around theory we should keep them around so we can learn their little trick." Then I figured it out. So now we're just like - is it really an issue? She's never mentioned it...
This isn't so different then your little plan to raise the anti-christ as a ...you know. Kid. We just catch up. Meet. Chat. and you know honestly you two were doing this in the garden while we were both- y'know working. I'm not a violent being unless called to be that said we're drawn to each other.
[Why are you not Aziraphale seriously ugh this is dredging up emotions it suuuucks]
Dates. That's like when Liesel snuck out with Rolfe the messenger boy in Sound of Music right? I mean he turned out to be awful so maybe that's a bad example.
A trick about what? Wooing partners? Because if that's what you're looking for, Aziraphale is not your best. He's charming, but not in the way most would think.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-08-11 03:52 am (UTC)I am cracking up
Date: 2019-08-11 04:05 am (UTC)are doing that.
It's called synergy and again. Beelzebub is on board with this.
speaking of this is not their phone is it.
So good
Date: 2019-08-11 11:48 pm (UTC)That's what the kids are calling it these days?
No, but I hope you don't mind it if I share these screenshots on the Hell snapchat, do you?
no subject
Date: 2019-08-12 12:20 am (UTC)They still has dominion over you - you still want to be left alone with Aziraphale don't you? the two of you...doing...weird and uncomfortable things with your corporations. We may be enemies but we have to work together.
no subject
Date: 2019-08-12 12:24 am (UTC)[He actually is, but that's not the point.]
They're not actually that weird and uncomfortable. Unless...have you been trying weird and uncomfortable things with your corporation? Are you trying to model on the two of us that much?
no subject
Date: 2019-08-12 12:43 am (UTC)...No!
No. For Her sake No. We just get together for...what'd they call it. "Bitch sessions." and out of everybody it turns out we have the same problems and so we talk and they're funny. Like who knew your kind could tell a joke that wasn't wholly blasphemous right? But they're funny. And again. Sanctioned. So.
I mean I'm lucky. We Archangels have each other.
[It's a hive mind some days. but others not so much]
They're all by themselves. I knew it was cutthroat down there but if half the things they've shared are true... they deserve somebody to talk to. They can be obnoxious and they're wrong about like 99% of the great plan? but you know. I'm confident I can make them come around. Understand things. Bathe. Love themselves.
[You know sit down, watch Sound of Music, maybe make them realize their entire existence and decision to disobey her Will was a huge mistake. Get them to clean up their humor a bit. Bathe occasionally.]
1/3
Date: 2019-08-12 12:56 am (UTC)2/3
Date: 2019-08-12 12:59 am (UTC)3/3
Date: 2019-08-12 01:00 am (UTC)[Crowley is doing no such thing but he can't wait to see what the reaction to that is.]
no subject
Date: 2019-08-12 01:02 am (UTC)Sent 2 minutes later
Date: 2019-08-12 01:02 am (UTC)oh my god Gabriel why are you so perfect
Date: 2019-08-12 01:11 am (UTC)He's an angel. 0: o )
Date: 2019-08-12 01:23 am (UTC)You do come up a lot it's true. And they don't really respond to my "Just give it time and they'll come around theory we should keep them around so we can learn their little trick." Then I figured it out. So now we're just like - is it really an issue? She's never mentioned it...
This isn't so different then your little plan to raise the anti-christ as a ...you know. Kid. We just catch up. Meet. Chat. and you know honestly you two were doing this in the garden while we were both- y'know working. I'm not a violent being unless called to be that said we're drawn to each other.
[Why are you not Aziraphale seriously ugh this is dredging up emotions it suuuucks]
no subject
Date: 2019-08-12 01:41 am (UTC)/1
Date: 2019-08-12 02:38 pm (UTC)/2
Date: 2019-08-12 02:39 pm (UTC)/3
Date: 2019-08-12 02:40 pm (UTC)It's just a given.
Like, you know. A fact. Right?
no subject
Date: 2019-08-12 11:50 pm (UTC)Have you considered asking them out? On a date?
no subject
Date: 2019-08-13 12:13 am (UTC)/2 I googled the sound of music and I forgot so much about that movie
Date: 2019-08-13 12:14 am (UTC)Dates. That's like when Liesel snuck out with Rolfe the messenger boy in Sound of Music right? I mean he turned out to be awful so maybe that's a bad example.
Or how the Captain and the postulant behaved?
no subject
Date: 2019-08-13 12:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-08-13 12:24 am (UTC)You've seen it right? great movie.
[Somewhere Beelzebub is screaming and has no idea why]
no subject
Date: 2019-08-13 12:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-08-13 12:34 am (UTC)I'll just go and ask Aziraphale. I know he'll help. You and he are friends. He must know a trick. Something.
no subject
Date: 2019-08-13 12:38 am (UTC)(no subject)
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